So, we have been living in Costa Rica for 12 weeks and I haven't seen a single star. (If you haven't been following our blog since June, I recommend you scrolling down to my blog post titled Hot Tub Time dated June 20th. It will give you some background as to why seeing the stars is so important to me.) I have really been struggling with the lack of stars here in the city. It is usually cloudy and rainy in the evenings since it is the rainy season. Even if it isn't raining, the lights from the city make it difficult to see any stars. I am praying that we will be able to see stars out at the ranch where there aren't any street lights. You see, sitting out under the stars in the evening is where I would go to talk to God. I usually talk to him any time all day long but there are certain times that we need to set aside to just be quiet and listen to him. Sitting out under the stars was my place in nature where I could be quiet with God. I need to find a new place. I sadly admit that I'm having trouble finding that place. I'm having a hard time finding a quiet place in nature here in the city, or a quiet uninterrupted place inside my home. I used to be able to either get up early before the family or stay up late after the kids go to bed but now it seems that I still have kids young enough to like getting up before 6am and some kids old enough that stay up later than I can keep my eyes open. I am home schooling now so I can no longer get that time after putting the kids on the bus for school. Don't get me wrong, I am still in the Word, reading the Bible on a daily basis and I am participating in a great weekly Bible Study but I haven't been finding those uninterrupted quiet moments when I can hear God speaking.
For the first time, I can see a direct correlation of being able to hear God speak to me and my mood. I became irritable and sad. I was having doubts about God's purpose for my life and doubts about the gifts and talents that He has given me. Even though 4 months ago I was certain about all of those things. A book that I am reading has helped me to see that this is Satan's handy work. Satan is very sneaky and sly, slowly working his way into our lives and waiting for the slightest crack in the armor to slither in and start spreading a dark cloud over our soul. Satan will put doubts in our mind and tell us lies that distort and twist God's truths. We usually don't even realize that it's him. And eventually, once his darkness has steeped long enough to blind us completely, he makes his move turning these thoughts of doubts and sorrow into prideful entitlement. This is when those deep regrettable sins begin to take root. It reminds me of the Steven King Novel "Under the Dome" where the alien children are treating all the people trapped under the dome as puppets. Getting inside their heads and manipulating their circumstances to see how much it will take to make them finally crack and succumb to the temptation. That is where I felt like I was, making my self vulnerable to satan himself. The good news is, Jesus has already conquered satan and through the power of Jesus Christ, who lives in me, I too can overcome satan. I just need to call upon the name of the Lord, Jehovah-Nissi. "The Lord is my Banner" and victor over our enemy. In my Bible Study, I am learning the different names of the Lord and how to use them when praying. It is very powerful. This has given me power over the sadness and doubts that I was having but I know that satan won't give up easily. He does not want us here in Costa Rica. He does not want us to build an orphanage that will raise godly men. Satan has a stronghold here in Alajuelita and he will not give that up without a fight. We must be on our guard even more than ever before and we need your prayers to help us with that. Please call upon the name of the Lord, Jehovah-Nissi, and ask for the Holy Spirit to move in this city and to overcome satan. Please pray for all of the missionaries and staff members involved with 6:8 ministries to remain faithful to studying the Word, spending time in prayer, and seeking God daily. (You can find their names at www.68ministries.org and click on the 6:8 staff tab) And please pray that I will again find that quiet place before the Lord, Adonai. (My Lord and Master. The unconditional lover of my soul.)
We are so thankful for all of your prayers and support.